Today I was driving around the new developments in the town I grew up in. I have a great admiration for architecture and I have an obsession with real estate. As I was marveling at the new buildings I started reflecting on what it used to look like. These reflections reminded me how long it had been since I had been home. This reminded me of how long it had been since I’d been to my mom’s grave. I set my “Waze” app to take me to the cemetery. As I pulled in, I saw a couple of other cars, and started thinking about what they are going through themselves. There was a few people cleaning, grooming, and loving the site of their buried loved one. Another woman parked, took out a lawn chair and a sun umbrella, and was reading a book while sitting next to the grave. There was a couple others throughout the cemetery and some workers tending to the upkeep of the facility.

Driving up next to my mom's headstone, I brushed off my mom’s headstone and picking some weeds. Sitting there in the hot Roseville sun and it got me thinking about all the events that have led me to where I am today.

I have had many challenges in my life, the hardest of which was learning who I am without my mom. She was a strength in human form. Despite having advanced cancer my mom was a shining example of how to live. It is easy to get caught in despair and fear. Yet, continuing to live your life how you want, shows true strength.

This idea of strength permeates ALL suffering. To classify someone’s life experiences as “harder” than your own, or to compare experiences only devalues your own struggles. Nobody knows what it’s like to be in the shoes of another person.

I wanted to talk on this idea of strength. In the world of fitness, this concept is only discussed when it comes to how much weight you can lift. There is a very different form of strength. This internal strength, is something we develop in response to experiencing hardships. As I said before, nobody knows what it is like to be in the shoes of another person. Your strength, and fortitude, is a positive outcome from the suffering you endured. We need to reframe how we handle these experiences. It is rough going through these times. But, by going through these experiences, we have an opportunity to love, cherish, and connect with other people in an deeper level than we ever thought possible. The fortitude you develop from the pain of these hardships has the potential to empower yourself and others when we wield it for our advantage.

So with these thoughts in mind, I want to leave you with this. The next time you are feeling the pain of a hardship, let that empower you. Let it help you build an indestructible base that allows you to become a better version of yourself. Let your pain, your suffering, your doubt, and your anxiety allow you to grow into someone who leaves a legacy of positivity, love, and gratitude for all you come in contact with.

Author: Chris Whalen